Tourist Class

Cheap air flights are all very well, but unfortunately lower prices mean that one increasingly encounters, well it must be said, riff-raff on one's travels. Fortunately, technology is at hand to provide products that make sharing a plane with the proles bearable.

First we have the Ultra-mini air supply. This ingenious device ensures that no matter how malodorous your travelling companions are, your air supply has "substantially reduced" germs and odours.

A visit to the loo is probably unavoidable on a long haul flight. If this proves to be the case we recommend toting a large box of "wet wipes" in your hand luggage. However, what about the possibility that some unrefined oaf without the benefit of a private education has been sitting in your seat on the aircraft before you come to occupy it? Enter the SeatWrap All-Inclusive! This fabulous product totally prevents contamination of one's designer gear by unsanitary substances deposited by The Great Unwashed.

So there you are, inexpensive air travel can be a viable option for the posh as well as the poor! Isn't that a relief?

UPDATE: It appears that some of my readers have felt that the above implied a certain degree of elitism on my part. Most of the posts on this blog are supposed to be humorous. A few are supposed to be serious. Here's a clue: this is not one of the serious ones....